Archive for December 2007

Happy Holidays

December 20, 2007

Santa Fights Giant

Well people, it has been fun. This holiday season has been finding me well and soon I will be flying out to NYC for Xmas with the in laws. It should be a great trip as it was last year and hopefully everything will be good.

As such, just like how my work schedule is mirrored by MaoChan, I have till January 2nd off and thus for the most part will be taking this time to recuperate and get energized for the new year. Thus in terms of posts going up, it will be slim pickings but hopefully now that MaoChan has quite an archive, 425 posts actually, that you can dig in there and enjoy some classics.

2008 will be a big year for the Party with the Beijing Summer Games and the inevitable military occupation of Taiwan, that wild she-bitch will rejoin the mainland soon enough.

I wish you all the best and I might pop in to post but otherwise, see you after Christmas.

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Just Like on Nip/Tuck

December 18, 2007

WonderGoo

They have opened a brick and mortar store to sell my semen. I heard there was a stampede of women there on Black Friday. Fear not as I will keep the shelves stocked.

It is so wonder.

Baby Blender

December 17, 2007

Baby Blender

Of the people who I have met over time, they always come back to one constant. They always say, “You find the line and don’t just cross it. You take a flying leap over it.” Well there was so far one line I can think of that I hadn’t crossed and that was the dead baby line. Well now at least you can think me disgusting while you take a sip of your drink fresh from the baby blender. And how better to put a smile on that face covered in baby juices than some dead baby in blender jokes?

What’s red and white and goes around?
A baby in a blender.

Why do you put a baby in the blender feet first?
So you can watch its expression.

What’s red and white, goes round and round and pretends it doesn’t give a shit?
A baby in a blender that flicked its own switch.

Why do they boil water when a baby’s born?
So that if it’s born dead, they can make soup.

I threw in that last one on the house, cuz it is hilarious.

*If you didn’t figure it out, this is a joke. The “blender” is a bathtub…. for grinding babies.

“Like ribs… only baby.”

The Dark Knight Leaked Trailer

December 14, 2007

The Dark Knight

I was super ecstatic to hear that the sequel to Batman Begins, The Dark Knight, is shaping up to be the movie it should be. A dark and truly gritty masterpiece starring none other than Christian Bale and awesome actor man Heath Ledger.

Now most people were worried that Ledger couldn’t play a villain properly let alone portray one such as the Joker after it had been done with such bravado by Jack Nicholson. But according to some, “Ledger’s Joker makes Jack Nicholson’s look like your drunk grandpa”. Now to go change my last name to Wayne and become a billionaire then my real life of fighting crime will mirror the movie.

Watch it will it is up over at IDLYITW.com

Babylon A.D.

December 13, 2007

Babylon AD

Most people hear Vin Diesel and then start to whine. Sure he has been in bad movies but that doesn’t make him a bad actor. People need to go back and watch Pitch Black to see how well and finely crafted that role was portrayed and built out. So finding out he is going to star in a film adaptation of Babylon Babies sounds good to me.

Vin stars as Toorop, the mercenary, who is supposed to escort a woman from Russia to Canada. He learns that she is manipulated by a synthetic virus and that what lies inside her can be the downfall of the human race.

Think Children of Men and add a dose of Blade Runner and a dash of Diesel. But one of the big reasons too is that it is set to costar Michelle Yeoh, who has starred in greats such as Wo Hu Cang Long (no tigers and dragons for me), Memoirs of a Geisha, and of course, Sunshine.

Teaser Video.

偽: 2007 Kanji of The Year

December 12, 2007

2007 Kanji of The Year

So the votes are in and we have a winner. The Kanji Kentei organization has announced the results of a poll to determine the kanji character that most represents 2007. The winner is the handsome fellow above is 偽 (nise/gi), which is used in words such as 偽製 (fake/imitation) and 偽物 (counterfeit/imitation).

From the fake news reports to all the stupidity in the parliament this year, Japan has been plagued by fakes. Hell, even Thai Ladyboys are in the mix to help celebrate this year in counterfeiting and imitation. What will be funny is when people realize this Kanji is actually a stolen image from Dutch people.

Check out the coverage at Japan Probe.

Japanese Girl on Girl Motorboating

December 11, 2007

They looked pretty good, are they real? Are they built for speed or comfort? What’d you do with them? Motorboat? You play the motorboat? You motorboatin’ son of a bitch! You old sailor you!

I think enough has been said.

Thank you TV in Japan.