Archive for the ‘Sex’ category

Old People Sex: Latest Craze in Japanese Porn Industry

June 18, 2008

The lastest trend in the hotness that is the Japanese porn industry is the booming drive for eldery porn, the porn that has grandpa giving grandma the wrinkly boner. Japan’s adult industry is worth over $1 billion a year (how is it not more?) and the old sex is thriving with companies such as mail order DMM’s catalog of over 2000 films a month containing 400 “mature women” films.

One star of the boom is Shigeo Tokuda is 74-year-old man in Japan. Despite suffering a heart attack three years ago, the lifelong salaryman now feels healthier, and lives happily with his wife and a daughter in downtown Tokyo who have no idea he is a 14 year vet of the porn industry with over 350 films to his name. And you thought you had a good alter-ego.

Old balls.

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Omorashi or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Hold the Pee

March 12, 2008

Omorashi

MaoChan, as most of you probably have figured, is no stranger to porn or fetishes for that matter. One such fetish that exists in the world is urolagnia, aka Watersports. But leave it to those crafty, industrious Japanese to take it to the next level and define their own genre of pee play, Omorashi (オモラシ / おもらし / お漏らし).

Broken into a few categories, omorashi is the fetish subculture that is mainly found in Japan in which one gets aroused from having a full bladder or is attracted to someone who is experiencing a full bladder. They find their climax in the moment of relief and/or the embarrassment when one loses bladder control and becomes incontinent. Check out the wikipedia entry which has some interesting tidbits on it such as how Japan has had to produce larger diapers to deal with kids being comfortable with self-peeing well into elementary school.

Salty.

Things Men Say But Don’t Mean

February 19, 2008

Macho Paradox

Men are a mystery to women, just as women are weird tampon using freaks in our eyes. But there are things woman say about guys this is very true, like when they say we don’t always say what we mean. Sure this doesn’t apply to everything we say but next time your man says, “Oh boy your meatloaf is great!” he might really be saying “I rather have sex with it than put in my body that gross concoction.”

Don’t worry because not all guys do this all the time, just sometimes. Like when we say “We need to catch up soon over a beer.” that usually just means “I want to be pleasant but I really don’t want to hang out with you.” But then again who would want to hang out with some jerk who poops on your rug. That’s right, I am talking to you.

Blah blah blah.

How to Buy Flowers For The Ladies

February 13, 2008

Ikebana Tiger Lily

Valentine’s Day is around the corner. Guy’s everywhere are wondering what the hell to get some woman they wanna sleep with. One standard fall back is flowers. But do you realize that flowers have meaning. From type to color, there is symbolism in them. The kind of symbolism that can mean the difference between “oh you put thought into these, let’s screw” to “oh you just bought some flowers, thanks”.

Above is a classic example of a personal favorite of mine, the Tiger Lily (Oniyuri in Japanese), being used in an Ikebana presentation. Lilies revered by the Greeks and thought it sprouted from the milk of Hera. They symbolize virtue, humility and devotion. The white is innocence, humility, and reverence while the pink stands for grace, gentility, and happiness. That’s right, MaoChan does his homework hence there is a Mrs. MaoChan. Oh yeah!

Color Guide.
Flower Type Guide.

Haneru no Tobira: Bikini Goo Men New Year’s Slide

January 25, 2008

So last night, the Misses saw yesterdays post and was all “Again with the boobs, do you think of anything else?” Well in actuality probably not. I am sure that all men think of is Steak and Tits. Well this is for you ladies and not so straight fellas, a special New Year’s edition of Haneru no Tobira. The gag? To cover your sexy self with goo and slide down while the host is in drag. It is nothing but hot bikini men covered in goo while sliding around action. Cuz that is what ladies want. Also Lunar New Year is soon approaching and thus a giant rat is shown on the floor.

The Rat (鼠) was welcomed in ancient times as a protector and bringer of material prosperity. It is an animal associated with aggression, wealth, charm, and order, yet also associated with death, war, the occult, pestilence, and atrocities. In the Chinese Zodiac, the Year of the Rat is associated with the earthly branch symbol 子.

From my Haneru no Tobira drug peddler, Japan Probe.

Kozue Chihara

January 24, 2008

MaoChan had covered in this post about some massive girl on girl motorboating action. Well, after a long search (none actually) and a few trips in the Mystery Machine, the case of what the fuck is the name of that awesome show has been solved.

The show is called Miniskirt Police and the girl is Kozue Chihara こずえ. She is an “Osaka native was a former race queen before moving to the TV world and who dreams of a Jpop career.” Wow a race queen and a…… who cares. More clips of her “talent” and “abilities” after the link.

Boobs.

*Hopefully this also makes up for missing a few posts here and there. If not, screw you too.

2008 Pirelli Calendar

January 16, 2008

Pirelli Calendar

What is the Pirelli Calendar?

The calendar is famous for its limited availability because it is not sold and is only given as a corporate gift to a restricted number of important Pirelli customers and celebrity VIPs. The Pirelli Calendar is perhaps the world’s only prestigious and exclusive “girly” calendar, featuring pictures generally considered glamour photography including artistic nudes.

Artistic nudes, that is probably the only thing you remember from the above block of text isn’t it you pervert. Well the link is SFW and really what is showcases is an amazing talent of the photographer. This year’s blending of dark colors with the contrast of the model’s skin really makes the images pop. Very cyberpunk which is always a plus.

Tasteful.