Posted tagged ‘Bacon’

60 Bacon Sliced Whopper

June 24, 2008

First God created Bacon. Bacon needed somewhere to live so he made Earth. But Bacon needed consumption, so he made people. But then stupid people shunned God and to punish them he put Bacon into pigs so that it was harder to get at it (before it was just walking around everywhere). People defied God and found the Bacon, locked away.

Once the secret was unearthed, it was sold to Burger King so that someone could go in and order a Whopper with 15 servings of Bacon on top, 4 slices per serving. And the man rejoiced, in his mouth was Bacon, in his heart was vindication, and in his soul he felt he had killed God.



Press Button. Receive Bacon. Enjoy Bacon.

January 9, 2008

Enjoy Bacon

Over the years, none recently, I have partaken in my fair share of property defacement. By the hands of a paint can or other means (including but not limited to bologna). I never though was able to really gain the skill to tag, just destroy. But some people tag but with humor in mind and I wish there was more of that than just seeing “EH3BOYZ 4 LIFE” or whatever other illiterate shit that people might put up.

My favorite one is above and I will definitely be doing it once I find some place that has a sign as such. The warm, happy feelings I get when I think to myself that in some place, somewhere, there might actually be a bacon faucet is the stuff dreams are made of. Now to find the bacon shower.